When trying to find balance you may find yourself constantly working to change your habits, your schedule, or your beliefs. Sometimes these changes may be 100% necessary.
The upside: you make a self-improvement and you and your family benefit.
The downside: you expend a great deal of energy changing.
What if you stopped wasting your energy on changing something that you see as a weakness or block in your life and try using it to your advantage?
An example
When my wife and I were working on figuring out a new schedule with our son Fionn and how we were going to survive with the lack of sleep we came up with what seemed like a good plan:
I worked during the days, so I got to sleep in the mornings while she and Fionn hung out. She was home all day with Fionn, so she got to relax at night while Fionn and I hung out.
Seemed perfectly logical.
We had it backwards
The problem with our plan was: Ashlea can barely even cope with the idea of morning, while I am one of those annoying morning people. After work and by Fionn’s bedtime I am usually tired and not at my best.
Our plan seemed reasonable, but we were expending energy to work through our limitations instead of accepting them.
4am cleared it all up
In the spring Fionn went through a ten-day stretch where he woke up at 4:30am every day and was energized and ready to play. Ashlea couldn’t do it; 6am is questionable, but 4:30am? For Ashlea’s operating system that was a no go.
So, I started getting up in the mornings. It wasn’t easy, 4:30am is tough even for a morning person, but I was far more capable of doing it than my wife. After a few days it just became part of my daily ritual and I got to spend some great time with my son before going to work. At the same time Ashlea started to take care of the bedtime activities, which occurred at a far better time of the day for her.
We each accepted our weakness for being effective at a particular time of the day, and changed our plan to work within these weaknesses instead of spending energy changing them.
What is a weakness you have that, if you stopped fighting it, and just accepted it, it would help make your life easier?
This is a very powerful Post Jeremie,
I often try to compensate for my weaknesses and do everything. Of course I am not able to do everything and therefore things get left undone. One example of this is in my writing. I am good at coming up with ideas and I have vision to cast my ideas and make them reality. I do have a weakness in getting my ideas conveyed in writing. One reason is because I think too fast and I can’t write down what I articulate as I can say what I mean. One example of this is in my own blog. I have found that my columns don’t have the professional flow and grammer that they should. My solution is working out of my strentghs. I still write my column, but I have my wife proof read it. The benefit to this is my wife has an administrative back ground and she is good at editing. I have also found that by doing video blogs I get my vision of the message accross without needing to articulate what I say on the video in writing. When I deligate my weakness and operate out of my strength I find success. Thank you Jeremie for challenging me with this blog.
Perfect example Scott, and just think of all the energy you save by not trying to edit on your own. I know you could do it if you put in the effort, but the effort is way greater for you than it is for Nicole. So, having Nicole edit is a great solution, and you can put the energy you save towards everything else you have going on.
I think as small business owners and future small business owners we often lose sight of this idea to save money and do everything on our own. As my business grows I hope that I can remember this lesson and not exhaust myself trying to do things that other people do better.
Thanks for the comment Scott!
Jeremie